Hi All. I’m a longtime poster here, but with a new name for privacy/anonymity.
Looking for thoughts/advice about stealth issues. Here’s my story: I’m mid 20s MtF. Pass *extremely* well. Pretty much no one knows I’m trans unless I tell them, including sexual partners. I live in a big west coast city. Have friends and acquaintances here who knew me from my transition days. Also have new friends who don’t know my history. I really like just living my life as a typical girl, and have been thinking about going deeply stealth. To me, that means changing my name and moving to a new city where no one knows me or my history. Basically starting a new life. Although I like the city where I currently live, I hold back from sending down roots here because I don’t want my old identity to follow me around. Don’t want to build a new life as a woman, and then be outted in casual conversations between acquaintances of mine (which I’ve already experienced). I have a very unique name so I think it’s easy for people to say “Oh you know xyz too!? Did you know she used to be a guy!? Crazy Huh!”
So I guess what I’m looking for is advice and thoughts on this idea of changing name and moving to a new city. Has anyone here done such a thing? Or know people who have? Are there common pitfalls to avoid. Easy mistakes? Tips? Is it worth it? I’d be giving up a pretty sweet life here, but I feel like in the long run I wouldn’t ever feel settled in this city where so many people know me, my name and my gender history. (not that many actually, but enough to make me uneasy) Are there any other resources you'd recommend for people considering going stealth like this? I'd love to be able to talk with people who have done this, but by virtue of going stealth, they are no longer around and visible for people like me to find and talk to.